Responding To A Kind Comment

I received a comment today.  I rarely create posts out of comment exchanges, but this one seemed like it may be of value or help to many people.  The reader’s comment came in response to a post I wrote here.

Comment:

Hey there. I was searching images using the word “birthday” when I stumbled upon your blog. I am not usually a blog reader but, as an artist, I enjoyed the painting titled “Birthday” and read on after appreciating it for a while.

I lost my brother 2 years ago and still think of him every day. I recently decided to discuss this with my family doctor and he immediately wanted to put me on antidepressants.

I was seeking a referral to a therapist, and told him that.

Yet, he pushed the pills on me and I left with a prescription (which I will not fill, because I understand that I’m grieving).

With your words for inspiration I will revisit the doctor in hopes of spreading understanding- “…help people distinguish between a) depression caused by physical conditions & cognitive thinking errors and b) grief caused by losing connection with loved ones.”

My appreciation runs as deep as the oceans.

Namaste.

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Response: 

Wow.  Thank you.  I am sorry for your loss and acknowledge your understandable and enduring grieving.

“Grief,” unlike other simple nouns, can be a misleading term.  To say “grief” often leads a listener to think that grief begins and ends within a measurable and “reasonable” period of time.  However, “grief” may be better described and understood using a different conjugation: “grieving.”  The form of the word suggests the process is ongoing, open-ended, and not-easily-determinable in a measure of time.  This may or may not be true, but if true, it may help people respond and interpret those who are grieving.

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